Weezer- The Red Album

Weezer ain't what it used to be, yes, but they have gotten a lot of unnecessary hatred thrown at them after their last album, Make Believe. The snobs and music press hated it, and although it is uncomfortably sugary at times, more hideous sounds have filled my ears. I'm all about second chances, so after a three year wait to see if Weezer could redeem themselves, I am left with mixed emotions.

If releasing another self-titled album known only by the color of the background is any indication of a good Weezer album, than this record should be pretty damn good. This album is all over the place. It's like the band had a bunch of ideas and just spread them out all over the table, put them face down, did the hillybilly shuffle, and then picked them up one by one and put them on record. Some of the ideas work, some dont'. The classic Weezer powerpop sound shines on songs like "Troublemaker," "Everybody Get Dangerous" and "Pork and Beans" (a song that dismisses all the haters out there). But everything else just lies there flat.

"The Greatest Man That Ever Lived (Variations on a Shaker Hymn)" is a rock opera of sorts, combinging rap, Greorgian chant, falsetto vocals, acoustic guitars and piano, spoken word, and straight up rock in a mess of a song. Like trying to chug a whole gallon of milk: it may seem like a good idea at the time, but once you try it you just end up throwing up.

"Heart Songs," while a little cheesy, is a homage to the music that influenced frontman Rivers Cuomo. It's a terrible song, but relateable. "Dreamin'" is another failed attempt at a feel-good flowery pop song.

A couple songs include lead vocals by the other members of the band, but leave nothing but a bad taste in your mouth.

The band tries to be adventerous, but if things were a little more cohesive, this might be a decent album. This just seems bloated.

Weezer myspace

Zs- The Hard

Unclassifiable doesn't begin to describe this. Chamber music shoved down the throat of a bunch of rockers, or rock music being beat into the heads of a bunch of classical musicians? Somewhere in the ballpark of Frank Zappa (think Grand Wazoo meets Lumpy Gravy maybe?) or if the Boredoms picked up some brass instruments. This single composition is 15 minutes of no-wave, avant-avant-garde wackiness. Excellent range of dynamics. Dig it if you like the Flying Luttenbachers or anything Weasel Walter has done.

Zs myspace

sBACH- sBACH

Bored? Been up all nite mainlining Fun Dip and pouring Mountain Dew into your Frutti Pebbles? Do you think the NES is the greatest invention of mankind and believe it will end all wars and solve wolrd hunger, rape, and class differences? sBACH may be right for you! Three easy steps and you'll be on your way to a magical journey into a doom-ridden 8-bit wonderland.

1. Quit your job, then fill your living room with blankets, matresses, and other soft objects.
2. Place the sBACH self-titled compact disc directly into your CD player. This is crucial! Make sure the label is facing up or it won't play correctly. Now, push play. It's the one that looks like a sideways triangle. Don't hit the square!
3. Consume a near lethal dose of sugar (or psychedelic drugs if you prefer, but that's for cheaters!). Now, let the sounds soak into your rigid ears.

WARNING: At times you may feel angry and want to punch something. This is normal! You may also feel disgustingly happy and want to dance around the living room in day-glo pajamas with feet. Completely normal as well. You may even be led to believe that you are a robot and that this music is conversing to you. Let it talk! Just remember, that when the sounds have ceased to come out of your speakers, it's OK to play it again.

DISCLAIMER: Suicide Squeeze records is not responsible for any property damaged during the listening of this record, nor will they pay for your trip to the Looney Bin.

sBACH myspace

They Might Be Giants- Here Come The 123s

They Might Be Giants...or they might not be. That has been a question for the ages. Man or machine? Alien or human? Pop stars or pop superstars? Whatever the case, They Might Be Giants are here to rock and inform you whether you like it or not. They recently released their 12th studio album The Else, produced by none other than the Dust Brothers (which was accompanied by a bonus disc of rare material). Full of quirky pop gems, nerdy anthems, and goofy irony, it everything a Giants album should be. Now back in children's album mode, the Johns release their third of the series, about what else, the 123's.

The songs topics range from the numbers 1-10, to a dozen, to infiinty, as well as various other songs, like a cover of the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse theme and a song about hot dogs. This isn't your typical children's album. It's a They Might Be Giants album first and foremost, so you'll sill get the bizarre humor that you've come to love, and they cover many styles: vaudville, disco, lounge, funk, and straight up rock.

Children's edutainment has really come a long way from the day's I was listening to Raffi sing about Baby Beluga and that fucking Bananaphone. Kids get to watch Yo Gabba Gabba! (created by the ska band The Aquabats, and featuring such guests as Biz Markie and the Aggrolites) and now they get to listen to They Might Be Giants. If I was a parent my kids would definitely get to listen to this. And while most kids shit like this (Kidz Bop anyone?) is annoying as hell, I still find myself singing along. Oh to be a kid again...

They Might Be Giants myspace

Lords- Fuck All Y'All Motherfuckers

Lords...Louisville's bastard children of raging punk rock. Featuring former members of Coliseum and Lickgoldensky and coming out of the legendary scene that brought us Breather Resist, Lords continue to do whatever the fuck they want. Fuck All Y'all Motherfuckers is a testament to the attitude these fuckers bring when they decide to rock. New album on Black Market Activities so you know they're in good hands.

Everything about this record tells you to fuck off. The artwork, the track titles, the lyrics...what self righteous bastards! Political, dirty, noisy, southern fucking metal. Either you get it or you don't. Rants against the government, religion, and dumb motherfuckers. Politically incorrect greatness. Muckier and dirtier production than their previous two records. Short and fast bursts of violating punk rock clocking in at under 23 minutes. A force to be reckoned with.

FUCK ALL Y'ALL MOTHERFUCKERS!!!

Lords myspace

Past Lives- Strange Symmetry

You may be sensing a theme, and that theme is bands breaking up. As you may or may not know, the Blood Brothers are no more. But the musicians involved have always been doing their own thing while doing the Blood Brothers: Johnny and Mark did the Neon Blonde project while Jordan and Codie teamed up with members of the Locust and formed Head Wound City. But the Blood Brothers have finally been put to rest. While I mourn the lose, I must look forward to the future. Several projects have already sprouted up featuring the Blood Brothers family. The majority of the group, 3/5 or 60%, have gone on to form Past Lives. Jordan (vox), Mark (drums), and Morgan (baritone guitar, synths) team up with former Blood Brothers bassist Devin (guitar). This 5 song EP is their debut on Seattle imprint Suicide Squeeze (Minus The Bear, Hella).

While the Blood Brothers were known for their chaotic, post-hardcore attack with dueling vocals, Past Lives shake off that notion and deliver a softer, more melodic sound. Shifting from quiet, trance like musings to Blood Brothers-esque ragers (albeit, Jordan's howls are toned down a bit from his blood curdling screams of the past), this little EP has a wide range of sounds going on. Xylophones and shakers, bubbling synth, bluesy Birthday Party guitars, and soothing feedback are jammed packed into 15 minutes. Noisy, but in a controlled environment.

Past Lives myspace

Git Some- Cosmic Rock

Out of the filthy ashes of Planes Mistaken for Stars emerges a new beast from the snowy mountains of Colorado. Git Some are 50% Planes and 100% noisy punk rock. In no way resembling the emotionally charged hardcore of PMFS, Git Some take all the primo punk bands from the 80s and roll them up into a big fat blunt and smoke the shit out of it. Black Flag, yep. Minor Threat, sure. The Dead Kennedys, why not? Unshowered, sweaty, gritty punk rock. These guys are putitng the fun back in punk. Shooting bottle rockets at government officials, getting piss drunk on PBR , bashing in the monitors with the guitars. There hasn't been a punk band like this in a while with so much energy beeing thrown at you from every direction. I can only imagine how they fuck shit up live.

Git Some myspace